4. Ideas Illustrated;

After spending most of the year feasting on worms, many British birds migrate for the winter months. Fed and watered, they have the body fat, strength and desire to relocate to the Caribbean, Africa or Mexico. ‘How very nice’, one may say, but what about those resident birds that choose to stay put and battle with frozen ponds and the soggy British winter? Buy the new issue of Ideas Illustrated here.

Written by Ruth Clifford and illustrated by Jacqueline Ford.



The swan

Where’s the best place to bird watch? - With the queen.
Favourite bathhouse? - The lakes.
Recently? - Played the lead role in a ballet.
Anything else? - If you try to touch me, I’ll break your arm.
Bird fact: Rather partial to a snail. C’est bon.



The red-breasted robin

Where’s the best place to bird watch? - A Christmas card.
Favourite bathhouse? - Garden fountains.
Recently? - Spotted making a snowbird.
Anything else? - Does not wear tiny knitted hats and scarves.
Bird fact: Is joined by robins from overseas during the festive season.

The GREAT TIT

Where’s the best place to bird watch? - Through some binoculars.
Favourite bathhouse? - Somewhere dirty.
Recently? - Fell out of nest.
Anything else? - Loves Baywatch.
Bird fact: Is continental Europe’s largest tit.



The City Pigeon

Where’s the best place to bird watch? - Anywhere that can hold my paunch.
Favourite bathhouse? - Puddles.
Recently? - Ate some sick.
Anything else? - Don’t share your pad with a restless bird.
Bird fact: Male pigeons have the ability to lactate.



The WOODPECKER

Where’s the best place to bird watch? - From inside a dark tree.
Favourite bathhouse? - Somewhere out of sight.
Recently? - Had a beak job.
Anything else? - This bird will not give you a peck.


As originally published in the Relocated issue of Ideas Illustrated.

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